A problem I've been coming (HAH) across while talking to friends has been that people assume that sex has to end in someone ejaculating. Historically speaking (considering our culture still hasn't completely decided women can orgasm [we can]) it's normally been men who bring an "end" to the session. This is a very unhealthy assumption to make about sex. I've even been hearing accounts of some women also assuming that men won't help them out in bed, so ignore their partners' needs. That just makes me angry.
What happens if no one orgasms from a sex session? Is it just foreplay? Do you no longer "count" it as real sex? Actually, that's not how it works.
Honestly, if you're being selfish in bed and only working to get yourself off, you don't deserve to have sex. That's masturbation. Do it yourself. If you have someone else in the bed with you (again, I have no idea how many people are there right now) the entire point is to make it an experience, and maybe the other person(s) will want to return.
Helping someone else to enjoy themselves is how you can figure out what you yourself like. Being selfish is not how it works. How is this so hard to understand?
Getting back to the orgasm part, not everyone needs to either. Or, neither of you do. Sex does not always mean orgasm. Do you know how hard (I'm mature.) it is to orgasm when there's a cold wind on your back, or you have a headache, or your partners' hair is tickling your nose, (or, as mentioned by a reader, you get a charlie horse) or you suddenly REALLY need to use the washroom?
Get back to enjoying the sensations, and how your partner is reacting to them. Besides, orgasms make you have to clean the sheets more.
If people are really fucking up sex this much, it's no wonder we live in a hook up culture. No one can figure out how to do it properly.
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